Caning of beer-drinking model a sign of true equality in Malaysia

ARCHIVES 2009

By admin-s On Aug 24, 2009

By The Asia File

Now that the Malaysian government has retained the services of a global PR firm, APCO, surely the spinners will be able to come up with some innovative communication strategies to limit the damage to the country's international reputation caused by the decision to cane Kartika Sari Dewi Shukarno, a woman who was caught drinking?

Here are some suggested approaches to assuage the outrage of the international media:

1. "It's part of our new equal opportunities drive". Men are routinely caned in Malaysia for a variety of criminal and religious offences so, in a forward-thinking, egalitarian society such as this, why shouldn't women have the same opportunity? 1Malaysia, 1Cane.

2. "It's part of our crack-down on binge drinking". International journalists, particularly those in Britain, will know what a scourge binge drinking can be, wreaking havoc in town centres every weekend.

As part of Malaysia's responsible drinking framework, there will be fewer happy hours, higher tax on alcohol, a ban on alco-pops and, of course, caning for any women caught drinking.

3. "It's proof that Malaysia is a truly multi-racial society". The government is keen to ensure that racist (sorry, I mean racial) harmony is maintained in the cultural melting pot that is Malaysia. And it understands racial sensitivities.

Therefore, Chinese or Indians are free to drink until their livers pack up, as alcoholism is a fundamental part of their wanton cultures. But in order to uphold the dignity of the true sons and daughters of this nation, Malays cannot drink (unless they are rich enough to do it in private clubs and/or pay off the religious police).