In Istanbul I Dare Dream

I met a fascinating lady in Sydney last week. We were discussing travelling, and we harped upon one of my must-sees: Turkey. She captivated my imagination one moment when she told me of this place in Istanbul (don't you just love how the name rolls off the tip of your tongue?) where two majestic monuments stood a mere distance apart.

From her lips, she painted to me the beginnings of a utopia of old. One monument was a Church, while the other was a Mosque. Both monuments, functional places of worship, had influences of the other in them, a product of the history of Turkey, having been ruled at one time or other by an amazing collection of world powers. These monuments had been altered by the victor of wars over the span of centuries past. In her words, the people now lived in perfect acceptance. They entered their place of worship to be near God, while respecting the beauty of the building opposite and the faith it houses.

I was hopeful. The various travelogues and blogs and write ups that I have read of this magnificent city did not paint a picture so beautiful. I was spellbound. Could such a place exist in my country?

I did some research, and found out that my new friend had got some of her facts skewed; it is a trait of hers, I realise in retrospect, but we shan't dwell upon it right now. I am not calling her a liar, for I truly believe that she believed the words she uttered. But here are the facts. I conclude here that the buildings my new friend was accounting were the historical Haqia Sophia and mesmerizing Blue Mosque of Istanbul. The Haqia Sophia indeed begun as a church of esteemed influence, but was finally converted into a mosque of sorts. The Blue Mosque was subseqeuntly built to compete with the then Islamic Haqia Sophia. As I type this now, and if I have gotten my facts right, the Haqia is a museum while the Blue Mosque still remains a place of worship for Muslims. So, that fascinating picture that my new fascinating friend had painted in my head did not really exist. That does not mean I am still not hopeful, a grace that that one moment in my mind had allowed to dream.

I would like to believe that in this vast world with its many intricacies, there exists societies that accept difference, embrace individuality. Peoples who respect their brothers and sisters who share similar features beneath the skin. I would like to imagine that there exists a place on this plane of ours where a Muslim, Buddhist, Hindu and Christian share the same God-given soil to pray to their professed God in the wee hours of the morning, and then later break their fast on the same wooden table under the same woody tree beneath the same waking sky. They will speak of their laughs and tears of yesterday, what their day holds for them till the setting of the sun, share their dreams of their tomorrows.

When I was in Sydney, I forgot about Malaysia. Hence, it follows that I was not aware of the whole temple-mosque debacle whilst I dreamed of my Malaysian utopia each drunken night. It was sad then when I returned to newspapers telling me that I was but a fool to think that my country was anywhere near my dreams. It pained me to hear the utterances from ignorant mouths, to see the outraged faces of intolerables, and the despair and dejection of the foolish, stupid hopeful dreamers like myself (and mind you, there are many).

Why are you here? Why am I here? Why indeed, are we here, stuck in this emotional abyss after 52 years of professed independence? Why are we letting our personal pride rule our emotions and dictate our actions? Why are we here, a place a mere shadow of what our dreams once allowed us to achieve, some 52 years ago?

It took the United States of America 200 years. That is true. But they were revolutionaries, they were on a trail that had no map, they were traversing the impossible to create a first of its kind. They made it in 200 years. But Malaysia, we have the benefit of the State's experience, we have a map for this journey of ours. Don't tell yourself that we are still young, that we have another 150 years to go. Our situation is entirely different from the States. 

Look at Singapore (yes, this comparison is as old as your mother. But like your mother, it is effective and true and always there like a pain). It took them 50 years to reach where they are now. And what Malaysians will say? Singapore is so small!!! It's so much easier for them! Good god, Malaysia is so much smaller than America too. And Singapore…they were literally thrown out into the sea with nothing to fend themselves with. They had no oil, little land, limited finances, limited people. But look at them now. Don't you dare say that it is because there are more Chinese people there. The reason for their success, I dare submit, is not because of their demography. It is because of their spirit. They had something to prove to the world. They were united as a nation, for the better of the nation. They cast their differences away, and was forced to grow up faster than their spoilt neighbour, who had it fairly easy for the rest of their independent life till this day. Singapore needed to survive, and so their experience to survive have taught them how to thrive, to live.

Malaysia is a beautiful country. We have beautiful people. We have a beautiful groundwork to surpass that of any other nation in any given aspect. But we do not know how to make all these into something beautiful. One may have the widest vocabulary in the world, but one will not know how to create beautiful poetry until one finds peace within themselves and a love for love and life. We are like that, we are not at peace. We do not love love and life. We love our money more. We love our cars more. We love our house more. We love our Pradas and Guccis more. We love our own asses more. We love ourselves too much that we are blinded to what we really need. 

It is sad what Michelle pointed out to me. That Malaysians have to leave Malaysia for a better future. It is like leaving one's family to get a better life. To an Asian mentality, that is preposterous. Malaysians leave Malaysia for a better education, for a better occupation, for a better lifestyle. How sick is that? Why can we not have all those at home? Why do we have to leave home to enjoy something that is rightfully ours to enjoy…AT HOME? Why can we not have world class universities? Why can we not have better paying jobs? Why can we not have a National Health Service or health insurance? I mean really now, what's there to stop us?

The only real thing stopping us now is the same thing that has stopped every potential in the history of time. Ourselves. Our self-doubts, our reliance and dependency upon others. Our inferiority complex, our fear for life itself. In retrospect, what life is there now anyway for any good Malaysian? This really is a life worth discarding, for the prospect of a better one!

We lack inspiration. We lack a drive to imagine a better life for ourselves. We are assaulted daily by propagandas and news sowing and fueling hatred in our hearts, and fear in our minds. Our politicians are encroaching into our inner sanctum, telling us how to think and dream. We are merely puppets with emotions. We talk, we bitch, we yell. But our hands still move as we are told, by the news, but propagandas, by politicians. 

We need a revolutionary to inspire us. We need somebody to spark our dreams again, to stand out and hold our hands, look into ours eyes and say: Son, dare dream, our time is upon us now, dare dream. Come with me and lets reach for our dreams together, I will not let you down, and the only way I will is when I go down myself. Son, dare dream…with me.

We need inspiration. I need inspiration. 

Come on now. Inspire me.