Let’s Rock and Roll!
Make no mistake – General Election is a dirty term.
It’s the season where things can get pretty rough and crazy. It’s the season where the good guys meet the bad guys and all the plugs are pulled and it’s a free for all. It is when the better man doesn’t necessarily win because WHEN THE GOING GETS DIRTY THE DIRTY GETS GOING! Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the 13th General Election!!
Let’s be honest, Malaysia is no stranger when it comes to playing dirty during a general election. We’re probably worst than Taiwan. Every candidate goes in with only one objective – to win. Nothing else matters. In the process, besides the standard brainwashing bit; contenders will dance, cry, laugh, sing karaoke, and in most cases, shout, curse, fight, and throw chairs. And it’s all done to convince us that they’re the right one to vote for. So far no candidate has pulled a gun or knife yet…
So, how does little Pakatan stack up against mighty BN? Sorry, I mean dirty BN. Please be warned – elections are no place for a gentleman. If he is, he’d better take out the word “gentle” or he will die standing. So what should Pakatan do to tame mighty, shit, I mean dirty BN?
They must play the game as it should be played; and that is to win at all costs. Wait a minute…this sounds familiar. Oh yes, Najib has already said it – win at all costs. The way I see it, time is of the essence, as Pakatan is already running late in the game. BN has already eaten and shit but Pakatan is now only peeling the potatoes. They must act fast and fast means NOW.
Start the air raids! No, air raids are not done in KLIA. It’s all done in cyberspace. They must bomb cyberspace with DAILY cyberamahs.
Simultaneously, they should start their land raids. Beginning with their own turfs, they should fan out their troops to every state with DAILY ceramahs to remind their supporters that they are still alive and canvas for new ones. All their leaders MUST go down to the ground and start talking to the people. Talking here means talk dirty. You may have honest and noble intentions, but this is not the time to talk like a pussycat. Pakatan must run down BN like a steam-roller, and whack BN left right and centre. With so many BN scandals hiding in the closets, I would be surprised if Pakatan run out of issues!!
Next, Pakatan should read up on the article on David Plouffe. He is one HOT dog! He accomplished what no one thought was possible – putting a black man as President of the USA. He is “The Man Who Made Obama”. There it tells of how David mapped Obama’s election campaign and the different roles and responsibilities he assigned to members of the campaign trail. Pakatan should listen to Obama’s speeches and see what fires the listeners’ spirit and imagination. I have. Obama’s winning speeches are a collection of short and simple, yet sharp and stinging rhetoric that he uses ALL the time in every state he visits. Words that is easy to understand and relate to and endear simple folks to him. Obama became President not because he is black. He is there because of David Plouffe. Of course I would be surprised if by now Pakatan leaders have still not committed to memory, Sun Tzu’s five fundamental factors and seven elements in the Art of War.
Let’s talk about the voting folks. You know, no matter if it is Japan, China, Indonesia, the UK, Europe, or the US, simple folks ALWAYS outnumber intelligent bastards like us, so it is always better to get the simple folks on your side. Simple folks are by definition the opposite of difficult folks. And the beauty is – they’re gullible. If you tell them you can turn water into petrol, they’ll believe you. Heck, these folks are so nice they’ll invite you to their house to screw their daughter if they like you.
