Kita Cinta…

The latest offering is MCLM; typical of overly serious academics and professionals – no fancy names. Now this is the most innovative by far because it’s like a talent search company.

By AsamLaksa

Malaysians are facing a new political dimension and I am not surprised many are confused, upset and simply disillusioned.

I had a good laugh when I came across the article “Next Poll: Cinta May Hold Hands with Kita” http://www.freemalaysiatoday.com/fmt-english/news/general/14287-next-polls-cinta-may-hold-hands-with-kita. How sweet. What they now need is a third party with another catchy name and then you have a coalition called Kita Cinta (fill in name here); party Rakyat anyone? Or Maybe HRP should join in and become Kita Cinta Human Rights; cool, right?

The old political boundaries are changing so much that I myself can’t keep up with who’s who or what. At one time Perak had a plague of frogs and I thought hey, that’s so biblical and maybe I should rush to the nearest synagogue in Malaysia to seek repentance. But I don’t know where. Maybe I should ask the minister how to contact APCO for directions.

Not to mention that there were so many by-elections. Y’all got to watch the cholesterol, boozing and smoking! Since Malaysia loves mottos: A healthy rep is a healthy nation! Cukup dah imprisonment and police harassment are occupational hazards for some.

Anyway, Blue for BN, Red for DAP, Green for PAS and sky blue for PKR. Then PR is formalised and I wonder what colour(s) would it use? I hope it’s not like the multi colour flags I see hanging from some open till late establishments. So, when I stand back to look at the sequence of changes from 2007 to 2010 of the Malaysian political map it reminds me of David Attenborough’s wonderful piece on the chameleon in Life in Cold Blood. Wow! Is it for mating purposes, camouflage, warning off rivals or simply because it can? Which is not so much a problem to colour-blind Malaysians, but it sure riled up some ultrasensitive kononnya macho people.

Now extreme right wing movements love to use puffed up names. For example English Defence League which sounds like some superhero group in an indie comic. Then these movements also love commemorating dates or events which are abhorrent to the memories of many living persons; May 13 Atrocity day, anyone? Then there’s the denial, rewriting and then glorifying of past atrocities; nah, never happened and even if it did, they deserved it. Then there’s the extreme right wing’s
need for objects as symbols, preferably things that can cause major pain and sometimes severe haemorrhage. Hoi, please leave the keris at home!

And what’s this third force? I don’t recall Jedi recognised as a religion in Malaysia and who skipped the second force? It’s all so confusing! Who is the third force? No one seems to own up, in fact denials is the name of the game. Is it because it’s something not socially acceptable like main kayu tiga? Or is it something always there but must not say loudly like the third leg? So every new group on the arena gets called the third force. Then when the old group sudah jadi boring and a newer group appears, the title shifts to the new group and the previous group becomes what force? Maybe to end these Force musical chairs, someone should be entrepreneurial enough to start a Third Force Party and get free publicity. Then join up with two other minor parties to become Kita Cinta Third Force. Or Third Force Cinta Kita… ah… maybe not because it sounds so wrong.

The latest offering is MCLM (http://mclm.org.uk/); typical of overly serious academics and professionals – no fancy names. Now this is the most innovative by far because it’s like a talent search company. No, it’s not like X Factor which is cheese. It’s more serious than America’s Next Top Model. It’s totally serious business, seriously. Carrying the MCLM label is prestigious as it marks them as desirable candidates for public office. A brand is a powerful thing. I can’t wait to see what the brand logo would look like. Please no boring stuff like four letters on a plain background, maybe a stencil of Tunku for local content wearing a beret ala Che Guevara.

A brand is a powerful thing. I wonder if Mr 1PM would introduce a rival 1Calon brand as well. It would be a good excuse for more public spending which would go under the radar. I mean, tall towers are too conspicuous.

Now what is next? It’s not over. Musical chairs ain’t over till the fat lady sings. Hmmm, she did sing but wrong song so tak kira. Now there appears to be a political awakening in East Malaysia. Berapa lama nak tidor? Pak Tidor pun dah cabut habis dah. It is still too early to comment on Rip van Winkle but I’ll advise don’t be too surprised to find many surprises as things have moved on while you were asleep. You won’t recognise your next door neighbours because they recently migrated from Indonesia and the Phillipines.

Really, what’s next? Expect intermittent light weight showers and be prepared for a few thunderstorms as the turbulent GE13 weather front moves across the nation. Beyond that, I’m no prophet.