What do you think? Am I a more honourable Malay if…?

Mariam Mokhtar, The Ant Daily

I declare that I am racist, but claim that Islam justifies my stance.

I claim that my generosity enables me to share Malaysia with other races, then ignore the rights of the Orang Asli.

I have the right to insult other people with names like “Crazy Chinese pig” and see nothing wrong with being offensive to non-Malays.

I insist that my rights are more important than anybody else’s.

I accuse the Chinese schools of supporting racism and practising meritocracy.

I am a jobless Mat Rempit, but show my “power” by being coarse and vulgar.

I am jealous that the Bersih 4 rally marchers, managed to muster 500,000 people onto the streets of KL.

I blame the Chinese for the problems afflicting my own race.

I claim that the Chinese are racist, when employing staff for their multi-lingual firms, but do nothing about learning a second language like English, or Mandarin to make myself more employable.

I claim that the Umno Baru party is not behind the red shirt rally, but find key leaders spewing racist rants at the rally.

I claim to be far superior to other races, then act like a thug, and wreck Chinese businesses.

I claim to respect other religions, but drag cow heads through the streets, and confiscate the Malay Bible.

I criticise the Bersih 4 marchers for the mess they made, but see nothing wrong in leaving trash and breaching no-go zones imposed, by the police.

I demand that crosses are removed from school badges, school walls and school books, because they are un-Islamic.

I demand that non-Malay children refrain from drinking during Ramadan, because they will test my endurance.

I demand that the “pendatang” Chinese leave Malaysia, but only trust my regular Chinese mechanic to fix my kapcai.

I feel entitled to use public property and get public sponsorship, for my son’s wedding ceremony so that I need not pay any expenses, out of my own pocket, especially when several hundred thousand people are invited.

I force businesses to shut because they belong to the Chinese.

I frighten others, by saying that when the DAP is elected to power, Christianity will be the official religion.

I have a joint-venture with a Chinese business partner, and expect him to do all the work, but I earn a hefty commission, because I can.

I have faith in a leader who has refused to clear his name in the murder of a model.

I issue a fatwa for wearing football jerseys, to protect the Muslims who are weak willed.

I kick dogs which are wandering the streets.

I know nothing about business, then blame Chinese black magic for my commercial failures.

I obey the ulamas and believe every word of their race-hate sermons.

I order church officials to remove crucifixes, ban hymns and prayers, when the PM visits a church, because Christianity is not the official religion.

I pay for Malays to be transported from other states, by coaches to KL, given pocket money, meals and a red T-shirt to “show” support.

I pick on defenceless Malay bookshop employees for selling books I disagree with, because it gives me power to make a Muslim woman feel intimidated.

I pretend I am a conservative Malay and hide behind the tudung, but enjoy sex before marriage and adultery.

I protest in front of churches, to protect our youth from being corrupted at the sight of the cross.

I report my neighbour to the moral police because she prefers the company of others.

I see nothing wrong in a PM and the deputy PM expressing delight at the turnout for the red shirt rally.

I see nothing wrong in supporting an allegedly corrupt leader, because the alternative is to vote in an Opposition which consists of the DAP.

I send non-Malay children to eat in the toilets and changing rooms, because they are not fasting during Ramadan.

I strongly support a prime minister who has allegedly been linked to the missing RM44 billion, in the 1MDB scandal.

I tell others to pray to God, but I then go to the bomoh to ensure my success in procuring a girl, or a good job.

I wear red, and threaten other races because I am “superior”.