When will they ever learn?

By admin-s On Jan 24, 2018

The assumption would be (a) I must have dressed in a sexy, revealing way to deliberately attract his attention or that of other males; (b) I acted in a flirtatious manner; and/or (c) I made suggestive physical contact. That was what I experienced some 30 years ago and nothing has changed.

June H.L. Wong, The Star

WHEN a friend shared that she had been falsely accused of having an affair with her boss, I immediately understood her shock and anger because I too was accused of the same thing twice.

The first time was when I was 24. I was a rising star in the newsroom, getting good stories and quite a few exclusives. I worked hard, spent long hours in the field and office to meet my deadlines and took my job very seriously.

But there must have been co-workers who couldn’t believe I was that good and decided that I was getting the juiciest assignments because I was – yup – sleeping with my boss.

I was completely ignorant of the gossip and it was my boss who told me about it.

My boss decided to tell me because he felt the gossip would eventually reach my ears and wanted to advise me to not be affected by it.

I was enraged because it was thoroughly unfair.

I also felt bad for my boss and his wife, who was a colleague in the same newsroom. To their credit, my boss did not change his attitude towards me, and his wife made it clear she didn’t believe in the nonsense and was very friendly to me.

And so I survived that episode as a home-wrecker.

But why was I targeted?

Because the assumption was made that if you were a young woman who was half-decent-looking, you must be the one who seduced the poor, hapless older man.

Last week, the Asian Correspondent reported on the “epidemic of sexual harassment in Asean” faced by female journalists from politicians.

Two Malaysian journalists recounted their experiences, with one saying how a politician sent lewd text messages and stroked her thigh during an interview and the other sharing how an MP had persistently inquired about her personal life and invited her to dinner.

I wasn’t the least bit surprised by their revelations because I too had my share of unwanted attention from politicians.

I used to cover the Dewan Rakyat meetings and many times as I sat in the press gallery, the guards would pass me notes from MPs trying their luck by asking me to have drinks or a meal with them. A few were even more blatant, inviting me to meet them privately at a hotel, for example.

But what infuriated me was the response from National Union of Journalists president Mohd Taufek Razak, a man who should have known better.

While acknowledging it was a longstanding issue, he went on to say women journalists should mind their appearance and not dress sexily.

He was also quoted as saying for “attractive” female journalists, “harassment can easily happen if both parties consent to it”, and that it was human nature for men to be drawn to women, and for women to attract the attention of men.

His remarks set off a firestorm and the NUJ was forced to issue a new statement saying the “appearance of a journalist should not be blamed as a cause of sexual harassment”.

Sadly, Mohd Taufek is the latest in a long line of men holding office who continue to blame women for getting sexually harassed or raped because they were pretty and/or asked for it by their dressing.

Asian Correspondent’s calling it an “epidemic” may be an exaggeration but sexual harassment is definitely endemic among male politicians.

This is backed up by the first Inter-Parliamentary Union (IPU) report on sexism, harassment and violence against women parliamentarians, released in November 2016, which revealed that “sexist or sexually humiliating remarks, gestures and images” and “threats and harassment” are common occurrences in parliaments around the world.

The survey found that almost two-thirds of female parliamentarians had been subjected to humiliating sexist remarks and 22% had actually experienced sexual violence, while 33% had witnessed their male counterparts being sexually violent with female colleagues.

I am familiar with this report as I had quoted extensively from it for an article on sexist politicians. So it is no surprise to me that there are male politicians who prey on women journalists as well, inside and outside of parliament.

As I have written before, back when I was a young reporter, sexual harassment, along with smoking and cussing, was part and parcel of my male-dominated workplace.

In the three decades since, the smoking and cussing have been banished but not sexual harassment, despite greater awareness and female empowerment. In fact, it’s grown monstrously.

This was evident from the #MeToo campaign that exploded after powerful US movie producer Harvey Weinstein was exposed as a serial predator and women all over the world shared their stories of sexual harassment, assault and intimidation.

Finally, governments and corporations are sitting up and taking notice and thinking reform. Hopefully, this movement in numbers too big to ignore will finally deliver real changes in attitude and behaviour between genders and women will no longer be at the receiving end of the stick.

I earlier mentioned I was twice accused of sleeping with my boss. Well, the second episode happened a few years back when someone posted about my “affair” on social media.

Friends were concerned and thought I would be embarrassed but no, not this time.

Instead, I was amused because I was accused of sleeping my way up at 24, and 30 years on, I was still doing the same thing? I must be one heck of an evergreen femme fatale!

Again, it was my then boss who alerted me to the nonsense. My reply to him was admittedly not politically correct but it was a “what’s good for the goose is good for the gander” moment for me. So I messaged him back: “Like you, sir, I would prefer them younger.”